On Wednesday morning, Jonathan checked back into the hospital for his third round of chemo. It is amazing how much you learn as you go through this process. I now have the charge nurses direct line. So first thing in the morning I called her to see if Jonathan's bed was ready. The last 2 times checking in we waited around for hours in the hospital for a bed to open up on the oncology floor. This time I called, we got right in, and they had his orders ready to go. He had his IV hooked up very quickly and we were in business. I feel like now that we are getting to know the people and the process, things are going better and far less stressful.
I can't begin to tell you how lucky we feel... Jonathan is handling this High dose Methotrexate really really well. He has some very minor nausea issues, and still has not developed mouth sores. That was something I really feared, because from what we were reading, those can be so painful and also prevent you from eating. So we are so grateful he is not having some of the more common side effects. Although he feels really pretty good while going through this dose of chemo, it is hard in other ways. He feels like he could be at home and is so tired of the hospital, but this type of chemo while in high doses in your system can be dangerous. So coming home too early isn't an option. While in the hospital they are giving him doses of kidney rescue medications making sure he does not go into kidney failure. If you come to visit him, you can not be in or around his bathroom. Apparently any fluids that leave his body have the chemo in it, and it becomes air born. The nurses have a cover for his toilet, and require a double flush system. I was told if he begins to vomit, I need to evacuate the room and get a nurse. (Again also very grateful the nausea is under control with this type of chemo) I think some of these nurses are a little overly cautious though. So it is hard to be at the hospital when you really aren't feeling that sick. But it needs to be safe for the rest of us here at home when he does come home.
Although the last two rounds of chemo were easier on Jonathan, they have been much harder on Jude. Every time I leave to go visit Jonathan, he cries because he wants to go see daddy. So Jude has been getting a few extra visits just for some one on one time with daddy. I'm noticing he is really beginning to miss daddy at night time. Daddy always put him to bed and Jude is doing his best to adjust, but is struggling a bit. Jax however is really doing great. I haven't seen any major attitude changes or anything that would cause worry. He is really our trooper. I think he is actually just enjoying having all these special visitors here to play with him.
Jonathan has really been spending the last couple of weeks with the attitude of... If I think I'm sick and act like I'm sick, I will be sick and probably feel worse. So last Tuesday he and a couple friends played 9 holes at the golf course. It was sort of funny, because he asked the oncologist, and got the go ahead. But a couple hours before he went to go play, his nurse came to the house to do his dressing changes for his port. By the time he was done golfing the brand new dressing had been sweated off. (This isn't really good because of his compromised immune system, this is where bacteria would be most susceptible) So at the hospital he asked the nurse if they have sweat proof dressings. The nurse said "typically chemo patients aren't golfing..." I think he took that as a No. Don't worry... He made another tee time for this Tuesday! I will ask to be trained to change his dressing so it isn't taped back on with minion band aids this time.
This week Jonathan's sister and new little bundle had their turn helping with the boys. That is one brave girl to drive 6ish hours with a 3 month old by herself. Not to mention taking on Jax & Jude with a 3 month old. But Jonathan was excited to see baby Matthew and visit his sister and his mom who also came to help for the weekend.
We continue to be overwhelmed with all the kind things people are doing for our family. We are hearing about people donating sick leave so family members can be with us more. We have had countless people volunteer to help in different ways at the big fund raiser in Moses Lake next weekend. I guess the entire line crew that works with Jonathan's step dad Don have shaved their heads in support of Jonathan. Again, I feel like a broken record, but having food brought to us is SUCH a blessing as well. I could go on and on... But we are so encouraged by how good, kind and generous people are.
I want to remind everyone about the "car wash" (Only now it is a BBQ, Bake sale, Honey sale, car wash) fund raiser. At this point, I'm planning on coming over to see everyone on Saturday. I know Jonathan is going to be feeling awful, but he is in good hands. So unless we get something horribly unexpected, the little boys and I will be there. It is on Saturday the 6th at C&V Auto in Moses Lake from 9am to 3pm.
As Jonathan and I walk through this journey together I find myself grasping at scripture, books, sermons, quotes... anything that is encouraging, or a gut check. I just want to make sure at every turn my head is screwed on right and we aren't making emotional decisions, but smart ones. This week I had a couple of things I came across that I think are worth sharing. The first was at church... for me, normally my most profound thinking happens there. David, the pastor, went over the very common story of Daniel and the lions. He said something that got me... Last week in my blog I mentioned people talking about the "why". Well David asked why didn't God just do something to stop Daniel from ever being put into the lions den in the first place. I thought, you know that really is a good question... God can do anything and why do we even have to go through something so scary. But the end of Daniels story makes the answer to the "why" so obvious. If Daniel never went into that Den, would we still be reading about him today? It is his story, his testimony. After the king saw how powerful Daniels God was, he told everyone he could think of. This week I spent some down time skimming through a book my aunt gave me and I came across a quote that also struck me. "As long as we see what has come to pass as being unfair, we'll be a prisoner of what might have been." (The book of awakening) We are learning to accept that life isn't fair, but it offers moments that will change us, moments that will become our story, our testimony.
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